Last week, I posted a quote by Gary Vaynerchuk on my Facebook business page. It received lots of attention and mostly of the good type.

We need to change the conversation about what success looks like. It’s not to make a billion dollars. It’s to wake up in the morning and be in a good mood.” Gary V.

Boom! Mic drop. Gary V just articulated in 10 seconds, what I’ve been trying to say for years.

However, there was a detractor. Someone who really did not agree with either me or Gary V. Which is OK because everyone has a different perspective, experience or opinion. That’s the curse 😈 and the beauty πŸ˜‡ of the internet.

He wrote that aiming for a good mood in life is a silly goal, and that anyone aiming for that is aiming for average. That success is hard and you need to ignore your feelings while striving for it.

Anyone who knows me personally will know that I would not just πŸ‘ his comment and move on πŸ˜† . His comment was a challenge, so I started a conversation. You can read the whole thread here.

Let’s unpack this comment and the assumptions it makes. And these assumptions are commonly made. In many ways, they are society’s default setting.

✨ Genuine success is hard.

What do you mean by genuine success? Success looks different for everyone. Or it should. But sadly, society’s prime measure of success is money in the bank. I’m not saying that it’s not a valid measure of success (I love having money in my bank account!) but it isn’t the only one. You can have a few, if you want.

What if you decide on other metrics and outcomes to define success? Ones that are tailored to you.

Years ago, my husband and I decided that we wanted to live semi-retired while still earning full time. We are a team, working for ourselves.

Today we don’t even know if it’s a public holiday or a Wednesday or the weekend or Monday morning. We just wake up in a good mood (except when the bin men come clattering round at 5:30am!) That’s a measure of success to us.

Does it have to be hard? Hustle and grind don’t guarantee success anyway, so why assume you need them to achieve success. You can find ways to work smarter through the tough bits. Why can’t the journey to success be about finding joyful ways to work?

✨ You have to ignore how you feel to make it happen.

Why do you have to ignore your feelings? Why leave being in a good mood to chance? Of course, there will be rough moments and bits that feel uncomfortable. I’m not by-passing the reality of life; but you can move through them.

What if you set a goal on how you want to FEEL in your life? Then take action to make that happen. Success, when it comes, will be more meaningful and satisfying. Feeling goals are as powerful as tangible, obvious goals such as money in the bank.

Β So many people follow other’s people’s version of success and feel unsatisfied or unhappy once they reach it. Or they spend their life chasing the impossible and feel like a failure. Because they ignored how they wanted to feel.

Β Build your creative business around a lifestyle that helps you wake up happy. That’s not silly. Don’t ignore your feelings. Work with them. Be deliberate about them.

✨ A Good Mood is a low bar.

Really? Being in a good mood is a low bar? Great – leave me with this low bar. I don’t need to hurl myself over higher bars then. You just saved me the hassle 🀣

Β In the FB thread, he equates aiming for being in a good mood with aiming for average in life. Again, if being in a good mood means I’m living an average life, then so be it. Really. I’m happy to be average, in that case.

And his final comment about good moods being a matter of chance…well, if you set Feeling Goals, how you want to feel in your life, then you greatly reduce the aspect of chance. You get to choose what puts you in a good mood and take action towards that. You increase the odds of being in a good mood!

✨ How about purpose and life force. These take work.

All are possible simultaneously. Measuring success by waking up in a good mood does not rob you of the ability to fill your life with purpose & life force.

And nobody is saying that worthwhile goals and success won’t take work. They will. But we get to choose what that work is and what success looks like while doing that work. Success is not a destination – it’s a journey.

To sum up:

The beauty of Gary V’s declaration is that we can make it mean anything we want. Your idea of average might be my idea of success, and vice versa. What puts me in a good mood might be the polar opposite to you.

We just need to stop thinking that having a billion dollars will put us in a good mood. That’s the point, I think.

Ahhh I love a bit of Facebook sparring πŸ˜† Thankfully, the chap was respectful and knew when to end the conversation without causing a fuss or becoming a troll. I appreciated that. Plus, I enjoyed the way it made me really think and assess my own stance on this.

What do you think?

Do you agree with Gary V’s statement or not? Do you agree with my perspective? Or maybe you see what the chap was saying?

​​​​​​​Hit reply – I’d love to know.

You can read the full thread, and his rebuttals, here.Β 

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